NOAH THE HERO!
June 24, 2008
Does my dad have a blog? How come I haven’t found it?? Every time Robin and I rent a movie lately we always end up with something really scary. I am not into scary movies. I never thought being scared was an awesome time. I’ve never been on a roller coaster, ferris wheels or anything else like that.I like to be safe on the ground. I’m not a thrill seeker like a lot of dudes. No thanks, I’ll sit here and read a book instead. When I lived in Florida with my friends we would go to Disney world or Disney land or Disney earth or whatever it was called. I can’t remember. My buddies were so excited to get on these crazy rides! They’d be like “c’mon man, let’s get on this elevator that goes up 40 stories and then drops you!” and I would wonder why I was there. I am a wuss. I have no problem admitting that. Listen, I want to live! I can’t take all of these chances! What would this entire world do if I was to be injured some how??? There aren’t enough tissues to dry the eyes of all of the ladies that would be shattered by the news!
I’m not a “MAN”. I’m sorry dad, but you’ve created a tender male to roam this earth. One more pathetic 4-F Registrant.
In gym class when they’d hang that rope from the ceiling and tell us kids to climb up to the top, I’d jump at it, hang 3 inches from the floor on the first knot for about 4 minutes until the teacher would blow his whistle at me, then I’d step off of the rope and complain about the rope’s effects on my hands. I’d take the protective gloves off and walk over to some darkened corner.
I’m like one of those unlikely heroes that a lot of “good feeling” movies have. Like Crispin Glover in Back to the Future. George Mcfly, the weenie who punches out the bully at the end and gets the girl. Except, I don’t want to punch anyone. I once saw this guy being a little rough with his rodent-like dog on the sidewalk, and when he saw my disgusted face he went up to me and said ” What?! You got a problem with the way I treat my Dog?! You wanna do something about it??!” I just said ” No, I didn’t say anything, sir! “
I just didn’t want to get in a fight with this giant of a man over such a quivering little rat dog.
But, As I was saying, We always wind up renting these horror movies and freaking ourselves out at night. I start thinking I’m going to get stabbed when I go outside. We watched the Sixth sense last night and I started thinking that there was a ghost standing over my bed at night….
I’m gonna go get something to eat….