TWENTY FOUR

Well, It’s almost check out time for me, folks.

I have been alive for 24 years! I can’t believe it either! I’ve never been this old in my whole life! 24 years old, not married and no children. 

I recently moved into my new apartment. I’m living with my good friend Matthew Brown. Unfortunately for me, the day I moved in was one of the Hottest days of the summer! My new place is on the 4th floor and there aren’t elevators so we had to carry everything up all those stairs, dripping sweat, thirsty and sick with Scurvy.  After I had emptied out my old apartment I went back and cleaned it as well as I could. The whole year I had lived in that place I had never vacuumed the carpet (I swear it’s only because I don’t own a vacuum!) So, it was pretty awful looking when I was cleaning. I gave it a twice over with the vacuum that I borrowed from Jonah, as well as some duct tape, but some things looked pretty persistent on staying imbedded in that carpet, So, I let them stay. Who am I , after all to try and evict a nice oil stain or cheezit crumb from it’s home?? The bathroom was the worst part of all but, I can’t get into now, It would only tarnish whatever lingering clean public image I have left. Hopefully, I can still get some kind of deposit back from my old landlady. 

I have no internet at my new place that I can steal from the neighbors. I have to go to the library near my home to write in this blog for you. 

The other day I went to see Hancock with Robin. I thought it was garbage. The Idea of a bum super hero seems like it could work out. You can work with that, y’know? Okay, He’s depressed because He saves people’s lives and they don’t thank him for it. His heroic acts always lead to big destruction because of his landings and his take offs and he smashes through things and all that, so the city hates him, but what can they do? They can’t arrest him because no prison could hold him!

So, you’re watching this movie and in one of the first scenes a young kid comes up to him and talks crap to Hancock who is sleeping on a city bench…. If you are ever watching a movie that includes young kids talking crap to adults and calling them A-holes, or using any other profanity, Leave at once! It’s a ridiculous attempt to try and make you laugh! You are watching crap. Really bad movie writers are running out of ideas, So they use the same stuff to try to make you laugh in EVERY movie! How many times do I need to see somebody getting kicked in the nuts? How many times is a group of little kids going to beat up Will Ferrell? Infact, how many times is Will Ferrell going to keep making the same disposable movie?! What kind of “crazy, weird, loud, obnoxious athlete, Spy or big loser” will you be in the next over advertised movie, Will? Oh, Oh, how about you get Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson,Luke Wilson, John C. Rielly,Vince Vaughn and that dumb kid who played Napoleon Dynamite together and make a movie where you guys are all on a little league football team that plays against little kids? C’mon! You could put a great scene in there where a little chubby kid who can’t act could kick you in the nuts! College boys will love it! 

Okay, Where was I? So, in this Hancock movie, Will Smith is a Superhero who doesn’t know who he is really. He just goes by the name Hancock. But the movie goes through all sorts of plot lines that all do a job of making the viewer lose interest and forget why they were even watching this movie in the first place.